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Who says Californians can’t make fun of themselves!!
Today’s blog is dedicated to my fellow Californians, and, especially to those of us who live in this wonderful, vibrant and exciting city we call the “City of Angels”
You know your a Californian when…….
1. You say “like” and “for sure” and “right on” and “dude” and “totally” and “peace out” and “chill” and “tight” and “bro” and “hell of” and “hella” (Nor Cal only) and “faded” and “stoked” and “fo sho” and you say them often.
2 . You don’t get snow days off because there’s only snow in Mammoth, Tahoe, Shasta, and Big Bear.
3. In school earthquake drills happen more than fire drills
4. You can wear sandals all year long.
5. You know who the roller skating, guitar playing with a turbin on his head guy is down at Venice Beach.
6 . You go to the Beach – not “down to the shore.”
7. You can fix your Starbucks Mocha Latte while driving on the 405 freeway during rush hour
8 . You know 65 mph really means 100.
9. When it rains it usually floods since we really don’t have storm drains.
10. Our governor at any given time can be a movie star.
11 . You judge people based on what area code they live in, North or south of Sunset, The Hills or the Flats, west side or east side, or North or South side of Ventura Blvd.
12. You might get looked at funny by locals when you’re on vacation in their state, but when they find out you’re from California suddenly you turn into a Greek GOD.
13. Your vacation time is saved for plastic surgery
14 . We don’t stop at stop signs… we do a “california roll”
15 . You can get fresh and REAL Mexican food 24 hours a day.
16 . All the TV shows you watch are in “other” states which get filmed here.
17 . We’re the Golden State. Not the Cheese State. Not the Garden State…..GOLDEN!!!
18 .We have In-N-Out Burger (Arizona and Vegas are lucky we share that with them).
19. You’re sick of playing tour guide and taking visiting out of towners to Disneyland, Universal Studios Groehman’s Chinese Theater, Malibu beach etc, etc etc…..!
20 . We call it soda, not pop.
21 . Oh, and no one from California calls it Cali… that’s how we know you’re not from around here.
22 . The fastest part of your commute is down your driveway.
23 . Your sense of direction=Toward the ocean and away from the ocean.
24 . You eat an In-N-Out burger at least once a week!!!
25 . The primary bugs that you worry about are electronic.
26. Your time figured by your driving commute is not by miles but in minutes it takes to get someplace.
27 . Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.
28 . You can’t find your other earring because your son/brother is wearing it.
29 . Your family tree contains “significant others.”
30. You see 25 lawyers chasing an ambulance.
31. More than clothes come out of the closets.
32 . More money is spent on face lifts than on diapers.
33 . Smoking in most places is not optional.
34 .You pack shorts and a T-shirt for skiing in the snow, and a sweater and a wetsuit for the beach.
35 . When you can’t schedule a meeting because you must “do lunch.”
36 . Your children learn to walk in Birkenstocks.
37 .You’ll reluctantly miss yoga class to wait for the hot tub repairman.
38 . It’s barely sprinkling rain and there’s a report on every news station: “STORM WATCH”
39 . You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from California.
40 . Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.
41 . You make over $300,000 a year and still can’t afford a house.
42 . You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown and can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.
43 . You need a part time job to pay for the pruning of those beautiful palm trees on your property.
44. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.
45 . A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.
46 . Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney IS George Clooney.
47 . Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.
48 . Both you AND your dog AND your cat have therapists.
49 . You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cell phones or I pods.
50. When asked if you miss having 4 changing seasons you say “We do have four seasons – Brush Fire season, Mud slide season , Santa Ana Winds season and all around earthquake season.
51. We call them sprinkles (not Jimmies) Submarine sandwiches (not Hoagies), and “Going to The Market” (not food shopping)
52. Being a vegetarian is not like telling someone your an alien.
53 When it comes to driving around Los Angeles, you know at least 4 or 5 different ways to get from point A to point B!
54. Pedestrian’s really DO have the right of way!
55. You don’t ask for autographs when you run into celebrities around town.
56. You remember the date , time and magnitude of the 1994 Northridge earthquake and, that in fact, this blog post is on the anniversary day 17 years ago.
57. It’s barely sprinkling rain and there’s a report on every news station: “STORM WATCH” and…..
58. If an inch of rain or more is predicted people are raiding the markets for bread and milk.
59. You know where “The Brady Bunch” house is.
60 Avocado’s are a staple in your house.
61. Not only do you eat at El Pollo Loco, you know what it means.
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