The media has been in our faces regarding the Real Estate industry for several years now . . . . since April of 2005.

Is it any wonder that WE have received an overdose of discouragement laced with disappointment????

Discouragement: The feeling of despair in the face of obstacles. Hopelessness.

According to Ray Sanchez, there are four symptoms:

#1 Forgetfulness – Departing from your attitude of gratitude. What unnoticed/unacknowledged blessings did you experience in 2007 — in spite of our real estate market conditions?

#2 Fear (Irrational) – Is this market ever going to turn around? Am I ever going to attend another closing or see another check other than the ones I write?

#3 Faithlessness – Have you lost faith in our industry? One of the reasons I had invested in our industry was the ability to somewhat keep my finger on the pulse. I still have faith in Real Estate.

I have run into more professionals who are now working menial positions in retail because the retirement (stock market) from their previous careers had been “messed with.”

#4 Falling Back – “I’ll just go back to my job at XYZ Corp.” You’ll never know what could have been if you had stuck this Real Estate thing out. I tell my trainees — it is the tortoise with his consistency who won the race — not the hare with his ADHD.

Regrets, I have a few . . . but then again, too few to mention . . . . . DO NOT GIVE UP.

Probably one of my regrets is that I gave up a potential career in the music performance industry -- back when guitar-playing folk singers from Memphis, Tennessee had a chance. Not to say that I could not dig out my twelve-string from under my bed and revisit that. After all, Grandma Moses turned in her first painting when she was 76, and at age 100, she illustrated an edition of The Night Before Christmas. She lived to be 101 and in the last year of her life painted twenty-five pictures.

According to Rick Warren, author of The Purpose Driven Life, these are some of the causes of discouragement.

#1 Cause – FATIGUE

When you’re physically or emotionally exhausted, you’re a prime candidate to be infected with discouragement. Your defenses are lowered and things can seem bleaker than they really are. This often occurs when you’re halfway through a major project and you get tired.

#2 Cause – FRUSTRATION

When unfinished tasks pile up, it’s natural to feel overwhelmed. And when trivial matters or the unexpected interrupt you and prevent you from accomplishing what you really need to do, your frustration can easily produce discouragement.

#3 Cause – FAILURE

Sometimes, your best laid plans fall apart — the project collapses — the deal falls through — no one shows up to the event. How do you react? Do you give in to self-pity? Do you blame others? As one man said, “Just when I think I can makes ends meet — somebody moves the ends! That’s discouraging!

#4 Cause – FEAR

Fear is behind more discouragement than we’d like to admit. The fear of criticism (What will they think?); the fear of responsibility (What if I can’t handle this?); and the fear of failure (What if I blow it?) can cause a major onset of the blues.

WHAT ARE THE CURES FOR DISCOURAGEMENT?

REST

If you need a break — take one! You’ll be more effective when you return to work. If you’re burning the candle at both ends, you’re not as bright as you think!

REORGANIZE

Discouragement doesn’t necessarily mean you are doing the wrong thing. It may just be that you are doing the right thing in the wrong way. Try a new approach. Shake things up a little. (Wear a different nightgown!)

RESIST

Fight back! Discouragement is a choice. If you feel discouraged, it’s because you’ve chosen to feel that way. No one is forcing you to feel bad. Hang on! Do what’s right in spite of your feelings. No feeling lasts forever.

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Tony Robbins stated that you can change your mood in one moment. Snap! Your choice.

Perhaps the best cure for discouragement is to put all your cares in a bubble and blow it the heck away.

Then sit down with pen and paper, and write down a plan.

Organize your thoughts. Organize your year. Then pray over what you have written.

Dream bigger than yourself. Live an expectant life. Embrace change.

Dr. Phil McGraw stated that one cannot change what one will not acknowledge.

Take inventory of your life and the things that need a’changin’!

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LEARN TO LAUGH AT LIFE’S LITTLE INCIDENTALS:

(Mother-Daughter matching ankle incidents — what do you do? Get color-coded ankle casts (by the way, the toenails are painted the same color as the casts!)

After researching and assessing my self-help book stash, I have come up with my own solutions for discouragement:

#1 Make a list of the things in your life which you would like to see positive change.

#2 Acknowledge that change needs to occur and it is going to start with YOU.

#3 Stop blaming your parents for your own mess. Let them off the hook, for God’s sake. Stop blaming others for your own mess. No one forced that fudge into your mouth! Remember, when you point your finger at someone, three fingers point back to YOU.

#4 Ask for forgiveness from those whom you have offended.

#5 Forgive yourself for bad decisions and bad judgment. Wipe the dust off your Nikes and move on. Put it in a bubble and blow it to the land of Far Far Away.

#6 Acknowledge that there were some things that happened that were totally out of your control* (remember your address ends in “Planet Earth” not “Heaven”!)

#7 Recognize that which YOU HAVE ALLOWED to steal your JOY:

(a) Unrealistic Expectations – Are your goals attainable and achievable in the time you have allotted?

(b) Unfair comparisons – Compete with your own time table. Not others. I’ve seen more rookie agents compare themselves to veterans only to end up . . . you guessed it: DISCOURAGED.

(c) Unnoticed blessings and miracles — Keep your eyes and ears open. Get out and meet the neighbors. People get bored and restless and desire to move. Be the ear when they are contemplating that decision. The best salespeople are good listeners. God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason.

(d) Uncontrolled ambition — It can be lonely at the top if you stepped on and over the bodies to get to the top — not a good thing. Remember: Buyers and Sellers come and go, but we Realtors are stuck with each other — la familia.

Acknowledge those who threw you the rope and the hot-air balloon which helped you get where you are (i.e., your managers and support staff and perhaps our IT Department — the souls behind the curtain).

#8 Maintain a spirit of gratitude regardless of circumstances*: Author John Maxwell said, “Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you react to your circumstance(s).”

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Okay. I’m stepping off my soap box. Perhaps I’ll wipe off the dust from my 38-year old Glenn Campbell twelve-string Ovation with internal Barcus Berry pickup and strum something – an old Joni Mitchell tune or Diamonds and Rust by Joan Baez. I also just purchased my friend Carol’s keyboard to start writing songs again and creating lead sheets. 

” DREAM BIG” — you just never know what might happen!